Ido?
by jumpintothefog
Summary: Mandy took a deep breath and counted to ten. What would Rowena Ravenclaw do? Then again, Rowena Ravenclaw probably never had "honeymooned" in a muggle supermarket in a canned beet display with her drunk boyfriend. Definitely not.


I've always imagined Terry as a pretty serious guy, but this popped into my head a while ago, and I had to write it down. So, here we go, a not-so-serious Terry...set after HBP, as they're no longer underage.

***I don't own anything. I wouldn't be here if I did***

It was a warm Saturday night in August when Mandy Brocklehurst almost killed Terry Boot.

She was working at a small muggle pub by the sea, waiting tables to help her parents pay her Hogwarts bill. It was just a normal night-until Terry burst in.

He was clearly drunk- his shirt and hair were rumpled, and he smelled strongly of firewhiskey. "heyyyyyyyyy-" he slurred. She stared at him horrified-where was the responsible, reserved boy she knew and loved? This staggering, rumpled mess was not Terry. She was trying to think of how to get him out of there when he dropped to one knee.

"Amanda Brocklehurst, will you marry me?" She just looked at him, mortified, while the regulars at the bar whooped and cat called. Terry grabbed her hand, trying to fit a-well, it _looked _like a shower curtain ring, although she had no idea where he'd get one of those-on her finger. He looked up confused. "It doesn't fit, " he commented, trying to fit it on repeatedly before it slid all the way up over her hand and on to her wrist.

Satisfied, Terry stood up and gave her a sloppy kiss on her cheek. "Atta Girl Mandy!" Crowed Russell, a regular. The rest of the patrons cheered as Terry dragged her to the door. "Wait!" she said. "Where are we going?" "We gotta get married," he replied, as though it was obvious. A confident grin spread across his face. "Don't worry, I got it all planned out."

"I'm working," she protested, and for a minute, Terry stopped, his face confused. Just then, her boss, the bartender, piped up. "No worries," he said, trying to keep a straight face. "I got it all under control. Go have fun." Mandy shot him a look, and Terry's face lit up. "Thank you, kind muggle!" And with that, he swept Mandy off her feet and left, leaving most of the bar to wonder what on earth a muggle was.

Terry carried her across the street, paying no mind to the honking cars screeching to a stop-in fact, he waved at them! "Sorry!" he shouted. "We're on our way to get married!" Mandy hid her face in horror as half the town looked on curiously, trying to distinguish who the strange man with glasses carrying a girl down the street could be.

After two blocks, several near-fatal car encounters, and one photo opportunity, Terry arrived at the local park. Upon entering, he set her down. There stood a homeless man, dressed in a black t-shirt. "This is Mark, " he said, as if talking to an old friend. "He's going to marry us. "

Mandy didn't know whether to laugh or to cry.

Abruptly, Terry wandered off, leaving Mandy with the homeless man, who was eyeing her. He winked at her, and she looked away, devising ways to hex Terry when this was over. All of a sudden, he came loping back. He handed her a bunch of flowers, roots and all, obviously just unceremoniously ripped from the ground, and draped a plastic bag over her head, a veil of sorts.

"We erre 'ere to 'elebrate the 'oly matrizomony of Tandy and Merry-" Terry's face shone excitedly, and a small crowd had begun to form, whispering and straining to catch a glimpse of what may have been the strangest wedding they'd ever seen.

"...youmaykissthebride." Mandy looked up, startled, as Terry caught her up in a passionate and fire-whiskey-laced kiss. The whole park burst into applause, and the homeless man presented them proudly with an old shoe and four popsicle sticks, which Terry profusely thanked him for.

She finally thought it was over-she could lure him back home and get him to a bed. She wondered how she was going to explain to her parents that her boyfriend had showed up in this little muggle town in Somerset drunk and tied the knot with her. But before she could think up an answer, Terry yet again swept her off her feet.

Mandy was at her wit's end. "Put. Me. Down." she said slowly and dangerously. "No can do, " answered Terry cheerfully. "Gotta go on our 'oneymoon." And once again, out into traffic they went.

Their "'oneymoon" turned out to be the supermarket. Or, as Terry pronounced it, "sooooouuupermarket." There, he constructed them a fort out of a canned beet display. "Just like camping!" he said excitedly, snuggling into her. "mmmmm...cozy." And with that, he promptly fell asleep.

Mandy took a deep breath and counted to ten. What would Rowena Ravenclaw do? Then again, Rowena Ravenclaw probably never had honeymooned in a muggle supermarket in a canned beet display with her drunk boyfriend. Definitely not.

There wasn't much she could do-magic was highly unlikely, seeing as muggles were walking by slower and slower, staring at the girl with a boy on her shoulder and a plastic bag on her head. "Hi Mrs. Sundale," she waved weakly at one. Great. Now even her neighbors had seen her.

She eased out of the "fort," as Terry had been calling it, and checked out her surroundings. It was getting darker out now, and so she dragged Terry out of the display. She splashed water on him-nothing. "Terry!" she hissed, slapping his face. Nothing.

Mandy had hoped it wouldn't come to this. But as the supermarket was gradually emptying-and would close soon-she had no choice. Snatching an abandoned shopping carriage, she-after checking to make sure the aisle was deserted-carefully levitated Terry off the ground and into the shopping carriage.

Many a strange glance was directed at her as she pushed her boyfriend-or ex boyfriend, by now- through town in a shopping carriage. "Is he all right?" an elderly woman asked her. "oh, he's fine" Mandy replied, through clenched teeth. He was now, she thought vehemently. But when he woke up...well, that was a different story.

When she reached home, Anthony and Michael were pacing around her front porch. At the sight of her, their eyes widened; however, hers narrowed.

"What's going on?" She asked suspiciously.

"Well-" Anthony began.

"Its kind of a funny story-" Michael continued.

"We were at Terry's-

And we sort of...

..erm, borrowed, his dad's bottle of firewhiskey-

and Terry drank, well, an awful lot...

and kind of..

wandered into the next room...

...took some floo powder-

and came here...

we didn't know where he went...

...but I guess you found him," finished up Anthony.

Mandy Brocklehurst brushed past them and walked up to her room without comment.

And Terry Boot woke up the next morning, very sore and with a screaming headache, completely unable to explain to a sympathetic Michael and Anthony how he ended up with a can of beets, an old shoe, and four popsicle sticks in his possession. *

what did you think? love it? hate it? I've never written fanfic before, and, quite honestly, am a stranger to this site, so comments on ANYTHING are greatly appreciated...thanks!


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